Although shit has been going wrong for my crazy ass Bethenny Frankel,  she will be gracing the cover of People Magazine Christmas Special.  It seems that ever since Bethenny rose to the top and disclosed the amount of money she received for her Skinny Girl Margarita she has been hounded by lawsuits and all kinds of assholes with their hand out trying to get at her money. The bullshit doesn’t stop there, Bethenny also tried her hand as talk show host, but the networks refused her that spot saying she is too loud and crazy plus needs to slow her ass down. I call bullshit on that maybe her ass should have a talk show ala Jerry Springer style and during reunion time she should take Miss Andy’s place because I know she would call those bitches out. That would be ultra!

Recently an article popped up on the NY Post were a “media observer” (Jill’s minions?) spewed out  that it was all Bethenny’s influence that got Jill fired and that not only is Bethenny a master manipulator puppeteer, but also PT Barnum. “She had done a reality show, with Martha Stewart’s ‘The Apprentice,’ before any of the other housewives, so she was always 10 beats ahead,” this so called insider also states that Bethenny slept around to get ahead. “She dated WireImage’s photographer Kevin Mazur and made sure to get pictures on the red carpet before anyone knew who she was. She is the best publicist-marketer-hustler I’ve ever seen. She is PT Barnum. But the sad thing is the amount of people she’s thrown under the bus to get to where she is.”

The same insider also states that Bethenny is in the habit of chewing people up and then spitting them out when they are no use to her “One of the lessons that Bethenny could stand to learn is that a lot of times when she doesn’t have a use for someone, she lets the relationship fall by the wayside and then they burn her,” When Jill was asked what she thinks about Bethenny’s brand her response was “It takes a lot of hard work and dedication to launch a brand,” then she adds “I hope she sees [the bad press] as a mere bump in the road and chalks it up to a lesson learned. Everyone makes mistakes but it is how you handle it that defines you.” Really? Really bitch is that how YOU handle things?

Jill The article goes on to says that Bethenny is a big pain in the ass “Being around her is like having chest pains,” and adds that Bethenny likes to scream a lot and keep everyone on edge “She is a horrible, horrible screamer. Every person around her is feeling the anxiety. She goes from 0 to 60 in a second. You open the door, and you have no idea. It could be a storm, it could be a dozen roses.”

And to stay relevant  and in the spotlight former cast member Simon van Kempen put his 2cents in and said that Bethenny is “quite a troubled soul,” Simon states that him and Bethenny didn’t always see eye to eye, but he still fells she is being unfairly criticized “Bethenny and I have certainly had cross words back in the three seasons when she was on ‘Housewives,’ ” he says. “She’s a very forceful woman, very opinionated. But it’s a bit cowardly for people to come out of the woodwork now when she’s had some bad press and kick her when she’s down.”

And according to another gossip columnist Bethenny knows how to pull the strings  and manipulate Andy who apparently she’s had in her pocket for the whole time she’s been working for Bravo because supposedly she gets special privileges “she pulled Andy’s strings like a master puppeteer,” the same insider states that Bethenny’s days are numbered and that Miss Bravo and the rest of the Bravo family are getting sick of her and about to pull the plug. “The minute she stops being viable for Andy and making money, he’ll walk away from her just like he walked away from everyone else,” the insider also includes that people on Bethenny’s payroll are getting tired with her demands “More, more, more, mine, mine, mine.” And supposedly the producers feel Bethenny has worn out her Bravo welcome. “I hate to say it, but as one of the producers from the show told me: ‘We’re just hoping it’s going to be, “Bethenny’s Getting a Divorce?” says the insider. “Because how long can this go on for?”

After, the towboat guy that helped Bethenny and her crew get back to shore called her a liar and a fat mouth, Bethenny fired back and went on “Today” on Tuesday to defend the statements she made regarding her “Lost at Sea” episode.

Bethenny went particularly crazy after the media and the Internet for the discrepancies regarding the amount she got for selling her Skinnygirl brand and the interview with towboat guy Tim Russell:

“There are certain people and certain bloggers…they want something to be wrong. They want it to be that I lie or cheat or I must have done if I can have this success,” “I don’t care about who’s writing garbage,” she says. “I think that we’re in world now where people believe the last thing they’ve seen on a computer and other people pick up these cancers.”

Bethenny states her and her crew were in real trouble when they were stranded out. She also announced she is putting a gag order on Tim Russell:

“My sound guy doesn’t know how to swim,” she adds “They lost a lot of the tapes because of salt damage…The towboat man who accused me of lying has been put on a gag order because what he’s effectively saying is that we called the Coast Guard. It’s like calling 911 without an emergency. I’d be in jail probably.”

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Despite recent Huffington Post reports that came out about Bethenny Frankel and her Skinnygirl Brand selling for 8.1 million which is way  less than the 120 million that was initially reported. Bethenny and Forbes are firing back disputing the Huff Post article. The full article was later removed and replaced with apologies for posting bullshit. Here is what they posted:

CORRECTION: Our reporter misread the $8.1 million figure in the financial documents. As Forbes points out, the number refers to the amount of Skinnygirl attributed to goodwill, not the total purchase price. We regret the error.

According to Forbes Bethenny laughs at the stupid suggestion that her brand sold for a measly 8.1 million.

“Come on. That it could be the fastest growing booze brand on the market and have sold for that little is just preposterous,” she says. “I’m going to be paying a hell of a lot more than $8.1 million in taxes.”

“Come on. That it could be the fastest growing booze brand on the market and have sold for that little is just preposterous,” she says. “I’m going to be paying a hell of a lot more than $8.1 million in taxes.”

The total Bethenny got for her Skinnygirl Brand is a matter of debate since there is a lot of complicated mumble jumbo, and contingent transaction shit that only a financial analyst would fully understand. But bottom line is 8.1 million only represents a goodwill value attributed to the brand.

 “The $8.1 million was just the amount of intangible assets purchased in the Skinnygirl transaction, essentially the amount Beam paid for the Skinnygirl brand rights—not the total purchase price,” says Morningstar analyst R.J. Hottovy, who follows the company and worked with us on our original reporting.

The Forbes article also states that every regular Joe six-pack isn’t equipped to understand celebrity finances. 

In Shuter’s defense, figuring out celebrity finances isn’t for everyone, and the company is completely opaque about the deal. The actual price they paid for Skinnygirl is nowhere to be found in the 10-Q. Frankel won’t publicly say what it is, citing a confidentially agreement, nor will Beam, arguing that it’s done all it needs to do under generally accepted accounting rules. “We will continue to disclose accounting data as required to be included in financial filings,” says Beam Global spokeswoman Paula Erickson, “but do not expect that a black-and-white lump sum ‘purchase price’ figure will be made available. Suffice to say, this was not an $8.1 million acquisition.”

On page 5 of the 10-Q,for instance, Beam lists $39 million for acquisitions in the second quarter of 2011. “The only deal they announced over that period was Skinnygirl,” says Hottovy. “This means [Beam] paid at least that much for Skinnygirl [during that period].” He adds that there may be additional elements to the deal not accounted for or visible in company filings, including stock options that could bring Frankel additional long-term returns.

In addition to up-front payments for the acquisition of Skinnygirl, Frankel had told Forbes that she’d get what she called “on-going back end”—payments based on how well Skinnygirl’s cocktails sold after Beam took control. These kind of earn-outs are called “contingent consideration” in accountant-speak and are common in deals where the acquirer wants to incentivize the seller to stick around and help keep the business on track.

Honestly, I think in the end whether Bethenny got 100 million or 120 million and is getting some of it now because that is how much her brand is making now, and later she is getting the whole enchilada with stocks and other payments that she is getting at different stages of the transaction, totalling around 100 million dollars or more in her lifetime, who gives a crap. This bitch still got a shitload of money for going on this trainwreck show hustling her bony-loud-mouthed ass and coming up with her Brand and selling that gold mine. She used her famewhoring for good not evil, so God bless her crazy lying I-got-stranded-at-sea-ass. You’re lucky I still love you Bethenny. BITCH!