On the last episode of Real HouseSkanks Of OC it wasn’t one of the housewives that told the other bitch off, but rather the daughter of the most obnoxious, control freak, veteran housefly, Droopy Ass Vicki Gunvalson. Bitch almost shit her depends when her 25 year old daughter Briana, let her have it and announced to her mother that she knew MORE about Vicki Sanchoing around with Brooks on Donn than Vicki gives her credit for. YES! Briana knows her mother is a cheating HO! This was after Vicki tried to make  this crapfest about Briana and Ryan when she brought up that Bri  was equally guilty of the same scandalous rushing into things behaviour since she was messing around with Ryan when he was married.

According to the internet rumors Ryan was briefly married very young  to another girl, before he was shipped off to Afghanistan. The marriage fell to crap real quick and Ryan’s ex-wife cheated on him while he was away. Supposedly they only lived together one month. This is all shit I read online on forums so it may or may not be true. Click here for a picture of Ryan and his ex they are the second couple on the left on the second page. Ryan looks like he is 15 in that picture with the ex!

Also some Vicki SECRET source told the blog RealityTea that Briana supposedly was hoing around with Ryan while HE was married.

 “He definitely was not divorced before he started seeing Briana,”  and that Ryan was NO “knight in shining armor marine,” instead according to this so called Vicki source Ryan was sanchoing his ex-with Bri. “He basically was sneaking around with her while married.”

I wonder who this secret source was? Could this be the ex wife? Or Vicki herself? Wouldn’t that be some shit!

Even though all this crap went down and Vicki almost exploded into tiny pieces when her blood boiled at Briana’s confrontational verbal smack down, she still went ahead and forgave Briana it appears. I’m sure the fact that she got to control, plan and run that wedding including wearing a white dress with her Circus Double F’s hanging out had nothing to do with her change in attitude now.

From Vickie’s Bravo blog:

“ I have chosen to accept Ryan into our family and I am proud to announce this past weekend we celebrated a beautiful destination wedding with 75 family members and their closest friends. It was a beautiful ceremony and celebration, one filled with love, dancing, and wonderful food. Brooks was in attendance, and so was Donn with his girlfriend. It was a bit uncomfortable at first having them meet, but at the end of the day it was for Briana and Ryan. Donn and Brooks shook hands, and both were very respectful of each other. The episode you saw tonight, happened well over seven months ago, and TIME does heal. We are in a much better place today, and I am grateful for that.

I am so happy for Briana and Ryan, and I know Briana is happy for me. I don’t know what my future holds, but all that I do know is life is short. . .or life is long. None of us really know when we will be called home to our Lord. Live each day as if it’s your last, surround yourself with positive people, and let the haters be haters. I choose not to listen to it, and to follow my own heart. It’s never let me down yet.”

Destination wedding meaning Santa Barbara California some 100 miles away from OC. It’s a beachy country feel out in these parts of Cali I can see why she got married in SB.

Wouldn’t that be some shit if Briana was asked by Bravo to join? She is a wife now, and a mom soon, (as confirmed by noisy Tamra) and I am sure will have a house to tend to, also and bitches like her mom to tell off.

It didn’t take long for Brooks Crooks to make the move from Missisipi to OC Cali to live as resident love-tank-filler/housebitch of Vicki Gunvalson. But, it also didn’t take long (I would think like 5 minutes tops) for him to get sick, fed up and tired of Vicki’s anal controling ways and not the type of anal that I’m sure Brooks was hoping for.

From Radaronline:

“He recently relocated to Orange County to be closer to her and that’s proven to be a complete disaster. He says he feels constantly irritated and annoyed by her and finds her possessive and controlling.”

Even though Brooks is already sick of Vicki’s controlling ways his ass is already addicted to the famewhoredom that comes with dating Icky Vicki, and enjoys all the attentions he gets from random ho’s when he makes appearances at super markets, whorehouses and massage parlors and shit like that. Yeah, hasn’t he realized that asshole bloggers are going to gang-punk clown on his ass and dig all of the dead bodies in his closet?

 Also, during the Wines By Wives event, gossipy witnesses revealed that Crooks and Vicki were NOT acting like the couple in love that Vicki is trying to pretend they are. Apparently, these two dipshits dind’t even arrive together to the event and Brooks was doing his rounds hitting on women and creeping them the fuck out:

“They didn’t arrive together,” the source says. “Vicki made some grand entrance in a Bentley while Brooks stood around in the crowd waiting for her. Then they were hardly together all night.

“Vicki stayed in one corner pretty much all of the night, holding court, while Brooks worked the room like a shark looking for his prey.”

“I saw Brooks hitting on several women and he seemed to be using pretty much the same old chat up line with all of them. A couple of the women spoke to me later and commented on how creepy he was.”

Was this creepo telling random bitches how much he loves them and their children, after two whooping minutes of knowing them?

Later on, when Brooks Crooks was probably already drunk off his ass and had a loose tongue he told a gossipy witness that he was sick of Vicki’s shit already. I bet the person he probably said this to, was some woman he was trying to pick up for an evening booty-call and that bitch ran to Radaronline to sell the gossip:

“Then, later in the night, Brooks told a friend of mine that he was sick of all of Vicki’s bullshit and that he was totally over her drama.

“I really don’t see these two lasting much longer.”

 How can someone who is supposedly so smart be so fucking stupid! I bet Brooks is going to rob this bitch  blind. I think it would be cheaper and more satisfying for Miss Alpha Female Independent Business Lady Vicki Gunvalson to just get a paid professional gigolo instead, at least they work out and are younger than this fat-ass, bloated, alcoholic unemployed loser Brooks who probably needs Super Viagra to fill her rusty Love Tank!

And now let’s move on to an ex-house skank that’s still trying to hang on to fame and like the flaming herpes refuses to go the fuck away. Lynne Curtin or Curtains flipped out on her dimwitted husband of 23 years (didn’t this idiot do this once before already?!) and told Radaronline she was filling for divorce from her husband. Except her husband didn’t know it yet but, she told Radaronline first so this way they can blind-side her husband and tell him the shenanigans she is up to.

From Radaronline:

“After more than 20 years of marriage Frank and I have decided to go our separate ways,”

“I love Frank but it was time to go out on my own.”

“I haven’t filed for divorce yet, but I’m going to be doing so soon,”

“Who knows what the future holds, but I’m looking forward to doing the things that I want to do,”

Did this bitch get evicted again? Because last time she threatened her oblivious husband with divorce it was because his ass was broke and not able to keep up the payments on their rented beach house, that this ho’ bragged up and down was their own home and since rent wasn’t paid on it because Lynn and her oldest daughter Raquel had plastic surgery they all ended up with their shit on the side walk and living out of their cars like dirty hobos. I wonder if she is threatening to walk because she had another face transplant and her husband Frank wasn’t able to keep up with her wild spending sprees and surgery addictions plus her Cuffs Of Whore line I heard wasn’t making any money.

This is what Lynne’s clueless husband Frank had to say about Lynne’s latest hissy fit, when asked for his reaction:

“It’s hard to even confirm it. How do you confirm something that you don’t want? It’s very heartbreaking for me. It’s painful to even talk about it,” Frank said. “I’m deeply in love with my wife. Business is so bad, it has caused a lot of stress in my relationship. I love my wife. She’s just not herself right now.”

“I’m not a willing participant in this. It hurts to even think about it or talk about it. Call me old-fashioned, but I take my vows very seriously.” The vow he is most likely referring to would be “for richer or for poorer.”

 Also recently on Watch What Happens Live! Tamra Barney revealed that the Curtain girls have long moved out and one lives with a boyfriend while the other with a grandparent.

 I feel sorry for Lynne’s dimwitted husband who is obviously so in love with her beef jerky ass he would die without her. I sure hope she gets over her bitch fit and takes him back, even if they both have to be beach-hobos together because I don’t think they can do any better than each other. Hang in there Frank!

Not only was Vicki Gunvalson blind-sided with her daughter Briana Wolfsmith’s sudden eloping escapade, it appears that a few days before Briana’s big splash do-over-wedding she announced she is now preggers with her first child and Vicki  who is not ready for this will now be a grandmother,  just like Vicki asked ‘only one trauma  per year.’ Last year was the elopement this year the pregnancy!

Briana was pretty pissed about not knowing anything about Vicki’s new con-man and felt her situation with Ryan is totally different than the faux-relationshit her mother and Brooks Crooks are having. According to the story posted on another site, Briana has known her boyfriend Ryan for like two years! For seven months he wrote to her from Afghanistan and they both kept avoiding commitment like it was ‘the plague’ but in a moment of crazy they both decided to drive to Vegas at 5:30pm to get hitched even though Ryan had to report to work at 6am the next day! Click here to read the whole thing.

Fortunately Vicki has now accepted that she can’t control her daughter’s life and decisisons Briana’s marriage and her new son-in-law Ryan.

And wasn’t that an AWKWARD moment when Briana and Ryan met Brooks Crooks? Brooks is such a Crook, you can totally see through this scammer that he is made out of glass because only a scam leach would tell people he loves them when he just met them, and when Briana called out his phony ass on their relationship being different he almost shattered, you could totally tell he was about to lose his cool. Crooks  reminds me of those phony people that act all nice and sweet and tell you everything you want to hear, and when they finally get what they want from you they end up  showing their true colors and become mean as a snake, rob you blind and say and do the most vile things. I’m just saying that’s the vibes this fool gives me, but only time will tell.

Congrats Briana Wolfsmith Culberson on your recent nuptials and new family!

After the shit hit the fan that, Vicki send out a letter back in September to a judge asking him to release her dead beat boyfriend out of jail. Vicki came back, denying that she knew anything about this!

Now her lying ass is saying that she only dated this fool a couple of times and had no clue he was a dead beat and a cheater. But in the letter she send the judge it specifically says that she knew this man and she knew why he was in jail for! WTF?! I wonder if the botox injections that are making this bitch look like a Jr version of Mama Elsa is now affecting her memory so that she can’t keep her lies straight.

From the Rumorfix.com:

Real Housewives of Orange Countystar Vicki Gunvalson tells RumorFix exclusively, “I had no idea,” that her new boyfriend is being labeled a “deadbeat dad.”

When RumorFix reached Vicki by phone, she was shocked at the news, ‘I’ve only just started dating this guy, we’ve had like three dates. I don’t know about any of it.”

Her reaction is odd because RadarOnline obtained a letter written in 2010 by Vicki defending her boyfriend David Brooks Ayers against the child support claims.

Yeah, I like how she calls him ‘this guy’ but, in her letter she claims to be a good friend of his. NICE!

Real House Skank Vicki Gunvalson’s new man Brooks Ayers  is being accused of being a dead beat  and a two-timer, who fucked over two women that he was involved with.

Apparently this guy knows how to get around because his ass was married to a woman by the name of Kim, they have three children together and while married to her, his dirty birdy-ass had an affair with some woman named Nicolette Catanzarite from Indianapolis, IN. While with the other woman he was  busy making babies also and so they had a son together. Later, they ended up breaking up and now  he owes about 40 thousand dollars total in child support to both women!

 What’s more fucked up is his ex-wife claims this doofus is a serial cheater of the 10th level, who was arrested two times in Mississippi and in Alabama for his deadbeat shenanigans. But, even though he is a loser Vicki Gunvalson still picked his ass up from the gutter to date him.

 It gets better, Vicki herself  who has slammed Slade Slimey for being a dead beat was already  hanging around Brook  Ayers when she was still married to Donn because it appears that back in September Brook got arrested for being a dead beat and Vicki herself  send a letter to a judge back then begging him to let deadbeat out of jail and this happened when she was still married to Donn! Click here to read the letter.

From Radaronline:

It’s claimed he owes about $40,000, in total, to her and another woman: his ex-girlfriend, Nicolette Catanzarite from Indianapolis, IN., with whom he has a son.

What’s more, we’ve also learned Vicki even leant her famous name to her beau’s case in a desperate bid to bail him out of his financial disaster.

“I am a personal friend of (David) Brooks Ayers and am acting on his behalf at this time,” the reality star wrote in an August 30 letter to a Mississippi judge, pleading for him to be released from jail.

It was written almost TWO MONTHS before Gunvalson filed divorce papersfrom husband Donn and while the pair was still living together at her Coto de Caza, Calif., home.

Their divorce is still pending.

“Due to the fact I live in California, I am unable to deliver this request personally,” Gunvalson added in her missive to the court.

“This letter is requesting a hearing before a judge as soon as possible.”

In an exclusive interview, Brooks’ estranged wife Kim, with whom he has three children, said she was fighting for what her shattered family was owed in lost alimony.

“My ex-husband has a history of cheating,” she claimed, citing as proof her husband’s illegitimate child with Nicolette, 16-month-old Joey.

“I’m offended by adultery — it’s not right.”

Brooks and Kim had been married for over 20 years when he suddenly filed for divorce four years ago. However, the divorce was not granted at the time he embarked on his new relationship.

“I don’t want him back,” Kim told RadarOnline.com. “What I want is the child support. He ought to do the right thing and take care of his kids.”

She also warned Vicki: “Sometimes you don’t know people. You have a choice to make. Do your homework! It’s not hard.”

The other woman in this complicated love triangle, Nicolette, told RadarOnline.com that she began a relationship with Brooks under the pretense that he was “legally separated” from Kim.

“I once thought of Brooks just what Vicki said on the show; he was the sweetest southern guy in the whole wide world,” she said in an exclusive interview from her home.

“But over the last two and a half years, I have slowly realized things weren’t right. He’s the catch-me-if-you-can type of guy. He’s definitely a deadbeat dad.”

Nicolette claimed she is owed $900 a month plus $19000 in arrearages.

She charged: “I want the bastard to pay child support!”

The deadbeat dad case carries more than a hint of irony for Vicki, who was been an outspoken critic of co-star Gretchen Rossi‘s boyfriend Slade Smiley, who as RadarOnline.com previously reported, owes a whopping $138,857.64 in unpaid child support.

I guess since Gretchen was dating a dead beat Vicki had to run out and get herself her own deadbeat.

Thanks to my readers that posted the link to this mess!