Bethenny is having a growling contest with Ginger, GRRRRR! BITCH! Jill tells Bethenny that her boobs look deflated and that she don’t approve of Bethenny dating a model. Bethenny tells Jill that she has more experience in this dating shit than Jill so shut the fuck up, and that the good looking guys have more self steem because they don’t have to pay hookers for sex and Jill  tells her do you see the lips moving? the lips are not moving! I love that Bitch!

Bethenny tells Jill about her plans to marry Frankie   and how she is  is determined, to have a child and she will have one, or steal one gypsy style if she has to.

LuAnn goes out with her nieces and invites Kelly for a sex in the city whore on the prowl  outing. They make small  girl talk with LuAnns nieces about dating. (LuAnns nieces look like Victoria) Kelly starts babbling out some stupid spewage about, how she can’t go out and eat salad when she goes out on a date, because she likes steak instead, with extra lines of coke on the side and that she likes to go out and do “stuff “.

All of the sudden Maxie shows up to say hi to Kelly and LuAnn was like wtfuck is this duff ball doing here? and Maxie starts to turn on  the gigolo charm and tells Kelly he will take her to tango lessons. LuAnn then realizes she can pay him to go out on a date with her next and flirts with him.

Maxie says that his perfect date would be taking that dumb bitch Kelly to McDonald’s. Kelly sound like she is having a stroke when she says ” hiiiiiiii”and “byyyyyeeeeeee” . When Maxie leaves, Kelly keeps saying “byeeeeeeee” in that annoying high pitch voice that made me want to stick shish kabob skewers in my ears!

LuAnn asks Kelly if she fucks Maxie and Kelly is all “nooo” and secretive and weird  about it.Kelly don’t answer LuAnns question because she is on coke .LuAnn tells Kelly to let her hair down as a metaphor and Kelly has a flashback of when she use to let weird old smelly pervs take nakid pics of her with their Polaroid for later and so she starts posing and waving her hair she look like an ASS! HA HA HA HA! LuAnn then realizes how Kelly snorted too much coke in the 70’s and snorted herself retarded!

More incoherent psycho babel comes out of Kelly’s mouth LuAnn says that Kelly’s philosophy on dating is someone that they “can do stuff with what ever stuff is.” LuAnn says that Kelly is a dumb cunt, and she will smack her during the reunion for that bullshit.

Silex is stressing over getting their shack remodeled and their new appliances being delivered.  Noticed how Alex was wearing her Sarah Palin custom? she was wearing the same clothes since the Halloween party because she was waiting for Sears to deliver her washer and dryer, see makes sense, so don’t pick on her for wearing the same clothes for a week and smelling like putrid ass.

Alex is  barking orders at the crew now she is stressing that it is raining and they have a pool in their front room so they decide to make it an indoor swimming pool and decide to spike the liquor with acid to make  people trip out and  believe it is a real indoor pool. That Bitch needs to worry about when she is gonna eat her next meal, she needs to use that kitchen to cook this time!

Bethenny goes on her blind date with her model  boy toy  she says she has no high expectations Bethenny meets her date and orders an skinny girl margarita. Bethenny is very happy that her blind date is cute to look at. Bethenny tells her date that its convenient that he is not gay then he orders a fat girl margarita.

Bethenny  announces to her date that she is a “ball buster” because she likes it rough , it goes over the dudes head she realizes there may be a small language barrier despite that little hump,Bethenny is going to bust his balls tonight, literally Bitches!

Kellly shows up at the Silex party first and bitches about having to go to the middle of the ghetto for this fucked up party, and that they better not put her name on anything, or else!. The house looks like a Gothic Rocky Horror Picture Show whore house, you know exactly matching Simons outfit for the evening!. Simon out gays Brad with his shinny Elton John jacket and his 80’s glam whore spandex, he keeps bending over in front of Bobby for some reason.

Next Bethenny shows up and says that their house looks like one of fucking  Simons gay as bizarro shiny tacky ass outfits that only crazy ass  Simon would wear. I agree. Next Jill shows up and is surprised everything was completed. Kelly tries to come up with excuses for ditching everyone at her previous Halloween party and Jill doesn’t buy it and tells that bitch to shut the fuck up!

Everybody keeps questioning Alex about which part of the ghetto in Brooklyn they are at and shortly after that everyone decides to leave early to avoid being mugged.

Next is the showdown between Bethenny and Kelly. Jill finally decided it is time for those two Bitches to trow down and so she arranges for them to go at it in Ally’s bedroom. Jill just shoves both of them in there and locks the door. Bethenny confronts Kelly about being a cunt and trying to steal Bethennys boyfriend and telling her that ” Im up here and youre down there, we are not friends” because of all the damage from meth and coke Kelly cant remember shit, because her brain is like a smushed banana. While on the confessional interview Kelly says she doesn’t know what Bethenny was talking about! For real bitch you dont remember shit? are you stupid or just pretending?

Then she tells Bethenny that Bethenny always thought that Kelly was high which she is,  and Bethenny is like yea you think? Bethenny then bitch slaps that ho who says” stop Bethenny stoooop” in that whinny voice, ” Bethenny just stoooop” then she  starts giving Bethenny complements in the middle of their argument wich was creepy and says “look at you you look good with your Saks dress and you are beautiful “and Bethenny is like wtfuck you crazy bitch? Kelly just continues to whine and Bethenny realizes that the bitch was super coked out  that and she cant remember shit about their last meeting and realizes how pointless it is to try and reason with someone who is obviously super insane and cannot even form a coherent sentence because the bitch’s brain is like a piece of Kentucky fried chicken, super fried extra crispy, from all the coke use.

OH yeah and Ramoner needs an IV of wine the minute she walks into any door or she will start smacking bitches around, specially Jill. So don’t forget that Bitches!